Praise the LORD, O my soul, for He is good

There will not be a lot of structure to this post, just to fore-warn you! It is late, past my bedtime, but I am wanting to write of my Lord's goodness to me. It is played out in so many ways for so many people, but I am becoming more aware of his amazing goodness He has shown towards me. The enemy lately has been trying to steal, kill, and destroy the work being done in my heart and life, and Jesus Christ is having none of it. I know I am being fought for, and I know I am engaging in battle. My heart is the Lord's, and I can truly say with everything that I have, I am HIS. I know whose I am, not who I am.

His goodness to me....where do I start??? To quote John, if I were to write down everything He has done for me, I don't suppose there would be enough room if the heavens were my scroll. Well, let's summarize it this way: when I have been faithless, He has been faithful. When I knowingly sinned by turning away from him and living the world's way, he has not stopped calling me and drawing me back to himself. He has called me by name before the world even began. He had a plan for my life before my ancestors were born. He drew me back from age 10 when I gave up on him being enough for me. He not only called me, he rescued me from a pit of darkness I didn't even realize I was in until he showed me. He took me to the edge of the desert, and walked with me into a wilderness season. Although the most painful time of my life thus far, this wilderness is also a time I cannot think on without rejoicing with IMMENSE thankfulness. I would not trade that experience, that pain, that suffering, that part of my story, for any riches this world could offer. I would not trade it for the promise that there will be no more wildernesses in my future. The wilderness is where I came to know Jesus Christ by experience, in a deeper level than I could have ever dreamed of. I walked into that wilderness with a skewed idea of who He is, no idea what ministry really was, a boat-load of sins, self-centeredness probably being a main one, multiple idols, and in the wilderness I was stripped of these things and clothed in a robe by my Father. I was marked as one of His own, a daughter of the King. I bear a mark of his nail scars on my palms. I have the blessed opportunity to share in his suffering. Oh what joy this is!! I am not my own anymore, for I am the created and He is my Creator. Who am I to make plans for my life? It is God's will that must prevail. Who am I to say how I want to live or how life should be run? I am not the Maker of it! If it were not for my Savior, Jesus Christ, I would not be here right now. There would be no breath in my lungs, no spirit in my body. I have no rights of which to speak. So what else can I do with this life but offer it fully and completely to Him to do with as He pleases? Anything besides that is pure selfishness and an incredibly wrong view of who God is. I pray I come to know Him more and more every day He gives me breath on this earth.

My LORD and my God, I will not be silent anymore. With your grace and your Holy Spirit in me, I will live each day, each minute you give me, as a living testimony to You. May my life be but a reflection of who You are. May others look at me and see right through the flesh and encounter Your Spirit. May You receive all glory and honor and praise and worship, for You truly are the only worthy One. I thank you for giving me life and for saving me from the penalty of my sins, and I rejoice in this amazing fact that you allow me to share in your work here on earth. I thank you, and I praise you! Will you draw Your people to yourself, as You have drawn me? You have my heart, and I love you with all that I am.