Sufficiency

Part of the fine print of walking with the LORD is the constant process of refinement and purification, being made more and more into the image of Jesus. Lately I've been called on the carpet on the area of self-sufficiency.

I know I can't do "it" on my own, however you define "it". My job. My relationships. My life's direction. The next conversation I have. The confrontation. The next assignment. Saying yes. Saying no. Stepping out in faith, not knowing if I will stand or fall. Whatever "it" is, I've been taught and experienced that on my own strength, I can do nothing. In God's strength, I can do everything. Sadly, sin pulls me into the "I try to do it on my own strength first" category often. I experience guilt, failure, mediocracy, dependence on others, laziness, a lukewarm heart, apathy, negative thoughts. I hear "You'll never be able to do this. You may as well give up. You're up against something or someone too strong."

In John 11, Lazarus has died while Jesus was away. Up to this point, Jesus had cured many diseases and cast out demons, but he had not faced death. Mary and Martha, close friends of Jesus, were mourning the death of their brother Lazarus when Jesus returned with his disciples. Martha ran to meet him outside the town, and said, "Lord, if you had been here, my brother would not have died." Wow. Her belief in the Lord was made clear right then and there. She believed he could cure the sick. She didn't believe he could raise the dead. In her eyes, Jesus' power was limited. She knew Lazarus would be raised on the last day. She knew God's power would be applied then. In her eyes, Jesus' victory over death would happen later. Jesus posed this question to her in response: "Did I not tell you that if you believed, you would see the glory of God?" He calls out her unbelief.

Mary comes out to meet him later, and she also says, "Lord, if you had been here, my brother would not have died." Hm. Same level of belief in Mary as was in Martha. Remember, when Jesus heard Lazarus was sick, he could have come and healed him from this sickness. When Jesus heard, John says Jesus stayed 2 more days where he was. John also says that Jesus loved Mary and Martha and Lazarus. Jesus chose to stay 2 more days where he was for a much bigger purpose than healing Lazarus from a sickness. In John 11:14 Jesus says, "Lazarus has died, and for your (disciple's) sake I am glad that I was not there, so that you may believe." Are you noticing a common theme of belief?

[Just an interjection that I find so humorous: When Jesus decides to head back to Judea for Lazarus, where he was previously pursued by the Jews to arrest him, Thomas, one of Jesus' followers, basically says, "Well guys, let's pack up and go with Jesus so we can die with him.", assuming that Jesus will be stoned to death. I love it!]

Jesus returns, he goes to the grave of Lazarus, and tells the men to roll away the stone. Martha, who has previously confessed Jesus as the Christ, feels the need to remind Jesus, "Lord, by this time there will be an odor, for he has been dead four days." She has confessed Jesus as the Son of God, yet she objects when Jesus prepares for Lazarus' resurrection. She still believes Jesus' power is limited. And then, for the first time on the earth, Jesus displays tha awesome authority of God, the power and victory over death, and calls Lazarus to come out. Lazarus comes, wrapped in graveclothes, and with all my heart I believe that Mary and Martha no longer doubted or questioned who this man Jesus is. They knew. They saw. They believed. And they finally believed in his full power.

I wonder what the faces of those surrounding the cave looked like at that moment...

What level of belief in Jesus do I live in?